The best company cultures have a great balance of being high support and high challenge. I discussed this topic recently with my team, and the further we delved into the conversation, the more I realized that this phenomenon applies to almost every area of life. However, it’s often identified by different terms—enabling and empowering.

When you look up the definition of each word, enable and empower, you find that both have positive definitions. However, enabling has taken on a more negative connotation which people associate with supporting someone so much that it ends up being detrimental to them. Empowering means almost the exact same thing, but we associate this more positively. We empower someone when we encourage and equip but also challenge them to play their part.

The best environments balance enabling and empowering; they offer high support with high challenge, which produces the best results in their people and for their people. Let’s look at a few examples of how this plays out in the world around us.

The best environments balance enabling and empowering; they offer high support with high challenge.

There are government models that are high support but not high challenge—we call this socialism. They want everybody to get something, but they don’t challenge them to earn anything for themselves. It doesn’t work. On the other hand, governments that are high challenge without being high support are dictatorships. These governments drive and force action without any positive incentives. The best governments enable and empower—true capitalism works in this way. It’s high support in that it creates an environment that is great for people to do business, but it’s high challenge because it is up to the people to make it work. When individuals succeed, they reap the benefits.

Let’s apply the same thinking to raising kids. If you are a parent that is only enabling, you are always encouraging, but you never make your child earn anything. In its worst form, you produce a dependent individual, completely lost and unable to function as a responsible adult. Dr. Tim Elmore, president and founder of Growing Leaders, says to these parents, “A lot of times, we want to prepare the road for our children, but we need to prepare our children for the road.”

Other parents are high challenge without high support. These parents push their kids and want them to achieve in the classroom, on the field, and among their peers, but they don’t provide the love they need. It’s clear that the best parenting is both high support and high challenge. It’s not easy, but when parents find this balance, they raise kids who live well in their years at home and beyond. If this is true in government and in family life, it is equally as true and applicable to work environments. It’s incredibly challenging to create a company culture that enables and empowers its people.

Chick-fil-A would say it this way: We value results and relationships. A high challenge work environment is what most people traditionally expect. It’s the high pressure, corporate environment that’s only about results and does not care about the individual, which leads to burnout and disengagement. The flipside is a high support environment that isn’t high challenge. This often happens on non-profit or church staffs where people feel cared for and loved, but the organization doesn’t always get the results it needs because it fails to hold people accountable. At different points in leading an organization, I feel like I’ve swung to either end of this spectrum. There are times when I’ve been good at loving people but haven’t been good at holding them accountable. Then I see the budget or the deadline approaching, and I swing to being high challenge without the support that people need.

This blog is a challenge to both me and you. We must support and challenge, valuing both results and relationships. Don’t get caught in the extremes of being an enabler or an enforcer, but focus on empowering and equipping individuals to succeed.

During a recent fight through Atlanta traffic, I was listening to the radio and turned the dial to 101.1.

It’s a station out of Ellijay, Georgia that plays southern gospel music during the day and country music at night. One simple and soulful song called “He’s Pouring Out Blessings” rang through my car speakers.

It starts like this:

‍I woke up this morning and got out of bed; He poured out his blessings on me.

I went to the kitchen for my daily bread; He poured out his blessings on me.

I went out to get in my old Chevrolet; He poured out his blessings on me.

I was down at a job; it’s another payday; He poured out his blessings on me.

‍This song of thankfulness for some of the smallest things in life was a reminder I desperately needed. Of course I’m thankful for the big things. But how often do I overlook the small, seemingly simple things we take for granted?

When was the last time I was truly grateful for getting up in the morning? Other than the sometimes obligatory or rehearsed prayer I say before a meal, when was the last time I sat down at a meal and was truly grateful just to I have something to eat? When was the last time I was grateful for the car that I get to drive? When was the last time I thanked God for my job? It seems like it’s far easier to voice my frustrations with my job rather than being grateful to have one.

So in this season of Thanksgiving, let’s not forget the blessings we often overlook.

This week, be grateful for the things you typically take for granted. American journalist Germany Kent famously said, “It's a funny thing about life, once you begin to take note of the things you are grateful for, you begin to lose sight of the things that you lack.”

In other words, when you appreciate what you have, you forget what you don’t.

Take a few minutes this week to make a list of things, big and small, for which you’re thankful.

Every single person faces change, and it shows up in various ways.

It’s the new system implemented at work that changes your routine. It’s the software update on your cell phone that annoys you. It’s the new microwave in your kitchen that you don’t know how to use. It’s the changing holiday traditions as your family grows. It’s the new salad dressing you have to choose because they’ve discontinued your favorite. It’s your new and longer route to work after your shortcut has been blocked.

When most of us think of change, we dwell on the big things—new jobs, new kids, new relationships. But every moment of every day presents change, and our natural response is to resist it.

That’s why leaders are positioned to help people accept the change that comes their way. Pastors are to fold new believers into their church families and help them navigate the everyday challenges of their Christian lives. Salespeople must convince their customers that the change to their product makes it better. Parents should help their children transition from one developmental milestone to the next and make a change as simple as drinking from a sippy cup feel like a good one.

Leadership is easy when things stay the same. It’s when things are changing that effective leaders stand out among the rest. So whether you are the president of a company launching a new branch of your organization or a parent in the throws of potty-training, here are four things that anybody leading change must do.

Leadership is easy when things stay the same. It’s when things are changing that effective leaders stand out among the rest.

1. Communicate why. Human beings are naturally opposed to change, so if we’re going to convince someone that they need to change, it’s not enough to tell them how to change; we have to tell them why. Why is this change going to make their life better? Why is this change necessary? If they don’t change, what are the risks they face? We are quick to analyze the risks of the change, but we often overlook the risk we face if we don’t change.

2. Use stories. Some people are driven more by facts and others by feelings, but when it comes to change, each of us tends to have an emotional reaction. In order to motivate people to change, we should use stories, narratives, and examples to help explain what life will be like once the change happens. We all feel more comfortable with change, and more willing to lean in, when we can grasp an image of what it might look like for us.

2. Confront criticism. As a leader in an organization, this is the toughest for me. When people criticize, complain, and say the change is not going to work, we have to confront it head-on. This doesn’t mean that you argue with or yell at people. It just means that you can’t allow push-back to go unresolved because it can stir up dissension, dissatisfaction, and discouragement.

2. Celebrate acceptance. What’s celebrated is repeated. When somebody has the courage to embrace change, we need to highlight it, acknowledge it, and thank them for it. If you’ve ever potty-trained a child, you know how big of a deal it is every time they use the bathroom. We ought to have that same level of excitement when someone in our office embraces change.

When change is necessary, use these tactics: communicate why, use stories, confront criticism, and celebrate acceptance. And don’t get discouraged. Leading change is tough, but if we didn’t have change, we wouldn’t need leaders.

To sprint is to run at full speed over a short distance.

It’s running the 40-yard dash instead of the marathon. In most cases, life is more of a marathon than a sprint. Whether it’s pursuing your goals, investing in your career, raising kids, or maintaining friendships, it’s more about pace than speed and endurance over a long period of time.

But there are times when sprinting is valuable. We use this term a lot in the business world, specifically in the realm of technology. If a company wants to develop a new technology, they might issue a sprint to make it happen quickly. They will do all of the research and preparation ahead of time, and then focus on actually building the new solution during a shorter period of time. So instead of taking years to develop a new technology solution or platform, a fully devoted team could be ready to launch in a matter of weeks, or even days.

While considering the way we leverage sprints in the business world, it made me think about how we might implement a sprinting strategy in our daily lives.

Often, I struggle to start an important task because it feels like it will take a marathon to complete it. It’s daunting, and the thought of getting it all done is exhausting. But in these instances, couldn’t we implement the concept of sprints to help us make progress?

Maybe you can’t muster the energy to go through your entire email inbox. What if you commit twenty minutes of your undivided attention to get through as much as you can?

Maybe the prospect of getting your house organized after a move feels overwhelming. What if you start by only organizing your closet in the 30 free minutes you have today?

Maybe developing a habit of reading seems impossible. What if you commit to reading five pages of a book each night? The average book is 200 pages long, so if you read just five pages a night, you would be on your way to reading up to ten books in one year!

The best way to tackle the task in front of you is to start with a small sprint.

The best way to tackle the task in front of you is to start with a small sprint. What area of your life could use a sprint? Identify it, define a short period of time that you can run at full speed, and block out the time to do it. A lot of times, the progress we make from a short sprint gives us the energy and momentum necessary to decide to run the entire marathon.

In this world, one of the first and most important lessons we teach children is responsibility. Beginning in elementary school (and sometimes even preschool), we train students to complete simple tasks, like getting their homework signed by their parents or placing their backpacks in the same place every morning.

It seems like such a simple concept to grasp, but as adults, we still struggle with this idea of responsibility.

In the workplace, we get frustrated with our colleagues who don’t take ownership of the work they fail to complete.

In our neighborhoods, we’re infuriated with parents who walk away from their children and abandon their responsibility to raise, care, and provide for them.

In our relationships, we’re unhappy with people who constantly fail to follow through or keep their word.

However, the failure to complete a task or fulfill a commitment is only one part of our frustration. Not only do some people not do their jobs, they refuse to admit fault or be held accountable.

Responsibility is about more than doing what you say; it’s about taking ownership of your actions. This lack of personal responsibility is a crisis we are facing in the United States. We want to hold everyone else accountable, except ourselves. Today, I’m suggesting we look at responsibility in a new way—a way that may help us see more clearly.

Think about it like this: “Responsibility is simply your response to your ability.”

“Responsibility is simply your response to your ability.”

YOUR response to YOUR ability. It’s easy to abdicate responsibility when we compare ourselves to others. We can all find people who are willing to do less. People are unique and diverse. We come from different backgrounds and have different strengths and weaknesses, so our standards of responsibility cannot be the same.

However, when we understand that responsibility is how we choose to respond because of what we can do, we will respond appropriately. Responsibility is not a response to society’s standards; it’s not a response to what someone asks us to do; it’s not a response based on our feelings. Responsibility is how we respond to situations based on our ability.

Before making any more excuses, we should ask ourselves, “Did I have the ability to do this or not?” And if we did, we need to admit that we fell short and own it.

If I didn’t complete the work I promised my team I would finish, I need to acknowledge it, admit that I had the ability to do it, and commit to getting it done the next time.

If I am a parent, I am going to respond to my child not based on my preferences or how I’m feeling that day, but I going to seek to be the best parent I can be.

Right now, we all need to resist the temptation to think about someone else who needs to take responsibility for their actions. This week, think about your opportunities to take responsibility and respond based on your ability.

One of our hallmark programs at ADDO is Chick-fil-A Leader Academy. It’s a high school leadership program created in partnership with Chick-fil-A that’s focused on impact through action. As of this year, it’s the largest leadership-specific high school program in America. A crucial component of Chick-fil-A Leader Academy is that students are challenged to design, create, and implement their own projects that impact their communities. We have an incredible team that works on this program, develops content, and supports schools and Chick-fil-A restaurants all over the country. It occurred to me that some of the newer members of our team know exactly what we do, but might not understand the core of why we designed the program to include this component.

I recently shared this with our team, and today I’ll share it with you: We have a fundamental belief at ADDO that the three most important leadership skills for the 21st century are communication, collaboration, and critical thinking.

In our program, we force students to not just learn but to actually apply. To do that, we put them in environments where they have to do these three things:

1). They have to communicate with one another by sharing their ideas, persuading one another, and finding ways to simplify and explain their objectives.

2). They have to work together. No project of significance can be completed alone. They have to work with people who think differently, believe differently, and work differently than they do.

3). It necessitates that they think critically. Students have to problem-solve by looking at what’s not working and identifying effective solutions. Often times they have to overcome obstacles or setbacks and design solutions to keep moving forward.

Explaining the purpose of impact projects to our team reminded me that we can often complicate and convolute the concepts of leadership. But at its core, leading people comes down to these three things: communicate effectively, collaborate with others, and think critically.

We can often complicate and convolute the concepts of leadership. But at its core, leading people comes down to these three things: communicate effectively, collaborate with others, and think critically.

We believe these are the most practical skills that leaders need to develop, and they are just as vital for adults as they are for high school students. There are other philosophies and processes that matter in leadership, but these are the practical pieces we must master. Remember the importance of communication, collaboration, and critical-thinking. Proficiency in these three areas will be the greatest contributors to your success and ability to be promoted in any job, within any role, and at any organization.

During a recent team meeting, I watched a common mistake play out before my eyes. It’s a mistake I see others make, but also one that I am guilty of making almost every day.

Here’s the scenario: During a discussion, one person jumped in to argue their point. However, they did so with little explanation, no supporting evidence, and insider jargon that others in the room didn’t understand. The person they were speaking to looked at them with eyes glazed over because they had no background or experience with this particular issue. One person had the context; the other did not. The conversation was completely unproductive. On one hand, I wanted to jump in and “translate” what was going on, but it also reminded me of one of the most critical components of communication.

The marketing world declares that content is king. This may be true, but it’s not the end of it. If content is king, context is key.

We must remember that communication isn’t really what’s being said; it’s what’s being heard.

If content is king, context is key.

In Chip and Dan Heath’s book Made to Stick, they unpack the Curse of Knowledge—a concept first described in a 1989 issue of The Journal of Political Economy. The Curse of Knowledge is the fact that the more we know about something, the harder it is to communicate it to others. We know the information so well that we assume everyone else has the same context we do, so we struggle to step back, look at it through their point of view, and explain it clearly. The Curse of Knowledge is a problem that permeates beyond the four walls of our conference room.

In your organization, there are specific things that have become a part of your culture because of an event or experience from years ago, so when you hire someone new, it’s not enough to explain what you do. To communicate clearly, you must move beyond what and explain why. By telling stories and sharing experiences, you help new members of your team understand certain practices, policies, and procedures.

The Curse of Knowledge also applies to sales. Sometimes, the closer we are to a product, the worse we are at selling it. We’ve all walked into the new restaurant where every item on the menu has a nickname. Unless the person serving you takes the time to explain what the items are and how the menu works, you’ll be frustrated before you even try to order. Without context, the content will overwhelm you, but with the proper context, you can have a unique dining experience.

Perhaps one of the most dangerous implications of the Curse of Knowledge is when it makes us less effective at articulating our faith to unbelievers. The further you are along on your faith journey, the harder it is to clearly communicate to those without your level of knowledge. We make assumptions that others have the same experiences that we do, understand our church services, or even our insider language. We must work diligently to overcome these potential stumbling blocks.

The Curse of Knowledge can even follow us home. At the end of a long day, it’s easy to vent our frustrations or tell stories about the day without providing context to our spouses. We make an assumption that someone as close to us as the person we married understands why we’re having these experiences at work, but without providing the necessary background information, our stories can fall on deaf ears.

Think about areas where you suffer from the Curse of Knowledge. Is there an area in your life in which you are so knowledgeable that you have become inept at clearly communicating? Take time to identify these areas, try to put yourself in the position of the listener, and seek to help others understand.

At the end of the summer, we took a company retreat and spent some time away from the ADDO office. We do this twice a year to cast vision, enjoy time together as a team, and talk about what’s next for our company.

Different members of our team lead sessions, and at this particular retreat, Patrick led a morning devotion to kick-off our time together. The anchor of his message was a quote from a former pastor of his: “What you meditate on, you magnify, and what you magnify controls you.” As he dove into this quote and explained it fully, I gained a new understanding of how our thoughts direct our everyday choices.

What you meditate on, you magnify, and what you magnify controls you.

What do you think about on a daily basis? What thoughts consume your mind? What do you dwell on in your life?

Typically, our image of meditation is a person sitting with their legs crossed and eyes closed as they peacefully ponder the meaning of life. But the kind of meditation we’re talking about is a focus or fixation on something. It’s what you dwell on, and it’s what distracts you from thinking of anything else. As the quote says, what you meditate on, you magnify

.I love this picture that Patrick painted for us. He asked, “Have you ever been to an IMAX movie theater?” Then he encouraged us to imagine sitting on the front row of one of these monstrous theaters. You’re leaned back, looking almost straight up, and all you can see is this giant, glowing screen. It’s so big and so overpowering that you can’t even see all of it, you can’t see the movie clearly, and you definitely can’t see anything else around it. He explained that if you meditate on something, it takes over your mind the way an IMAX movie screen engulfs you on the front row. It is on the forefront of your mind, and it’s all-consuming to you. It becomes so overpowering that these magnified thoughts not only affect your emotions; they control your decisions.

As we examine the things that consume our thoughts, it’s often the difficult experiences that overwhelm us long after they have come and gone.

Someone special hurt you years ago, and it hinders your ability to have a healthy relationship today.

You were taken advantage of by a friend, and now, you respond differently to people because of it.

You had a bad experience at a church, so you’ve never gone back.

As a child, you witnessed your parent’s marriage fall apart, and it’s preventing you from committing to the person you love.

You won’t go to that grocery store out of fear that you’ll run into that person that you despise.

If you’re constantly meditating on something bad that’s happened to you, you magnify it, and you won’t move on from it. I once heard a sermon on forgiveness where the pastor said, “When you hate somebody, your world gets smaller.” Isn’t that true? You might actually choose not to go to a place or participate in some activity because someone you don’t like might be there. What a shame! If your mind is consumed by the negative, you will live in the shackles of your past circumstances.

Maybe, as you’re reading this, you are thinking of something that you have dwelled on for far too long. Perhaps this is the first time you’ve realized that you’re allowing those experiences, that pain, and those thoughts to control you. Decide today that you will stop meditating on and magnifying that experience. Once you stop dwelling on it, it will become smaller to you. The smaller an object becomes, the less control it will have over you.

Instead, focus your thoughts on what’s important. “Let your eyes look directly forward, and your gaze be straight before you” (Proverbs 4:25, ESV). When you magnify what matters, your life will improve.

Earlier this year, I was in a meeting at Chick-fil-A, listening to David Salyers speak. David spent many years in marketing at Chick-fil-A, and he shared incredible insights, but one thing in particular stuck with me. It’s an idea that Truett Cathy, the founder of Chick-fil-A, always promoted and espoused.

He explained, “Sometimes, 10% more effort yields 100% more results.”

“Sometimes, 10% more effort yields 100% more results.” - Truett Cathy

In business, we often focus on addressing the negative—finding the things that are lacking that need improvement. We spend time, energy, and effort on fixing the problems, and we should. The experiences of our customers and employees are vital to our success. But we often focus so much on the problems, that we forget to make the good even better. There are times when investing 10% more of our time and effort into improving positive experiences will yield 100% more of a return.

A few months ago, I discussed the power of moments in a blog focused on a family’s experience at Disney World. In many ways, I’m sure the people at Disney spend time addressing the negative—they look at improving wait times, having contingency plans for rainy days, providing more places for families to rest, and creating more food options for their diverse customers. However, Disney understands this powerful principle: some of the most important work they do is making their top experiences even better. They ask questions like, how do we rework the fireworks show, so it’s even more magical?

How do we add to our number one attraction to make it more memorable?

‍With finite time, people, and resources available to us, often the greatest return on investment comes in an unconventional way—not just from fixing the broken things but from improving the best things.

One of the programs we do in conjunction with Chick-fil-A is Chick-fil-A Leader Academy. As part of the program, participants create projects that impact their community. This is one of the highlights and the most important parts of our program. We have applied the principle of focusing on the positive and have found ways to make these even better.

For example, we’ve found that short, personal conversations with facilitators or participants in the program—where we provide a little bit of direction for something remarkable that’s already going to happen— can take their good project to the next level. A short interaction makes a major difference in a project’s overall impact. One participant had an idea to create a Senior Senior Prom, an event where seniors in high school hosted senior citizens for a dance at their school. Our team reached out and provided a couple of small ideas that could increase the impact of the entire project;

‍What if you also provide a red carpet that the senior citizens walk down to make them feel more special? And what if you have each of the senior citizens write down what they wish they would have known at their high school senior prom? These are examples of how 10% more effort could yield 100% more results. Now, when everyone walks away from this event, they will remember the little touches, the extra special moments, and the emotional connections that made this event impactful.

This idea of 10% more effort takes many different shapes in our daily interactions.

It could be the balloon the hostess tied to your daughter’s chair at the restaurant on her third birthday.

It could be the quick email you sent to one of your student’s parents, letting them know how their child has grown in his reading comprehension this month.

It could be the “my pleasure” you received after thanking the Chick-fil-A employee for setting up your child’s highchair when your hands were too full.

It could be the phone call you make to a faithful client, asking them about their most recent experience with your company.

It could be the hotel staff that grabbed your bags and helped you to your room before you even had time to ask.

This week, audit your activities. Are you dedicating all of your time to fixing the negative? Look at positive areas of your life where spending 10% more effort could yield 100% more results.